Monday, April 11, 2011

Diabetes is Easy.

People have told you this before, right?  Diabetes is easy.  All you have to do is make sure you don’t eat any desserts.  Have an insulin pump?  Well then, diabetes is even easier.  You don’t have to do anything - the pump does it all for you. 

I’ve denied it too long.  I’ve come to see the light.  Diabetes is easy.  Heck, it’s like a simple math equation.  In fact, let’s make what happened to me on Friday into a math equation to show just how easy diabetes really is:

Karen is hungry and would like to have a bowl of cereal for lunch.  (Karen is not going to have sugar-coated-sugar like Cookie Crisp or Cap'n Crunch.  Karen will have Kashi GoLean Crunch.)  Karen is starting with a blood sugar of 60.  Karen has also done 30 minutes on the treadmill and put in a brand new infusion site.  What will Karen’s blood sugar be 2 hours after consuming the cereal?  Please remember to show your work.

mathOkay, so:

Blood sugar 60 (low)
+ cereal (high)
- exercise (low)
- new site (low)
- a boatload of insulin (low)
- a 2 hour 130% basal (low)

=   a LOW post meal blood sugar.   Right?

WRONG!!  The correct answer is:
Blood sugar = 404 x y
where x = large ketones and y = huge amount of diabetes guilt over eating cereal.  (That’s right, GUILT over eating a bowl of cereal!!!)

Awww “for fuck sake” (hi Reyna!!), I calculated that one all wrong.  And I was a whiz at math in high school and college.  Maybe diabetes isn’t so easy after all.


  1. I hear that sister. I could never figure out if I hated math because of the D, or if I hate the D because of math. Good ole cereal.

  2. Amen to that I call diabetes my 2nd full time job and I need to get paid for all the work that is done !

  3. There's no way to get an A in Diabetes Math :(

  4. This was bang on!
    thanks for allowing us to laugh at your misfortune. :) I get the food guilt every-single-time!

  5. hehe, that made me giggle because it's so so true! sometimes the math just doesn't add up :)

  6. Ugh I hate it when people think it is so easy. Just one day and they would change their minds I think.

  7. I suck at math and still do. Gotta hate the unpredicatables! I know I do.

  8. I had to laugh at the math equation. So true.

  9. Put on top of that, that next time you might eat the same exact thing and come up with a different outcome. That's the stuff that bothers me! Love the nod to Reyna.

  10. Ha! Uh-Oh, am I dragging the DOC down to my level? :)

    The equation is making my head spin Karen. You had a lot of factors going into that 404.


    I hate the "y"... the guilt. I think that has got to be the worst part of the answer.

  11. You left out post-low rebound(high) from your original equation! I'm sure you would have gotten it if you remembered all the variables. ;) But since you showed your work I will give you 9/10 for this problem.

  12. You said for fuck's sake! And I love you just a little bit more or that! I often fail at those math equations - damn D!

  13. awwwww...imsorry

    the math alone would killme

  14. Lol, loved the article, but i think i enjoyed the comments more.
    Keep up the good work.

  15. I love that Reyna is wearing off on you! :)

    D math is like mystery math, where you never quite know what the answer will be.


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